Over the past two weeks, since Roe V Wade has been overturned here in the US, I’ve experienced three main emotions:
As a woman, rights can feel like lollipops. The indignity of begging, screaming, convincing, reasoning, demanding to be seen as sovereign beings with agency decade after decade is exhausting. Sometimes we get a lollipop right away, sometimes it takes a while. And sometimes it gets taken away right from under our eyes. What. The. Actual. Fuck.
I felt a deep loneliness as I cried for our foremothers who have inched our progress forward, getting us the right to vote, education, bank accounts, property ownership, legal protections…many basic things. And I felt incredible grief for our daughters who now have to navigate a world where their own bodies don’t belong to them.
Finally, and perhaps the most importantly, I felt:
Progress is cyclical. Let’s use slingshots as an example. They work by storing energy in the rubber bands. The stored energy is called potential energy. The farther back the rubber bands are stretched, the more potential energy is stored to throw the rock farther out.
We’re in the phase where we’re pulling energy farther back into the slingshot. It looks like we’re moving backwards, but this is the moment that is going to spark massive movement forward. Roe V Wade needs to expand to be more inclusive and also not be a women’s right issue. It’s a medical issue that pertains to everyone’s bodily autonomy. Can your blood be donated to a dying person without your consent ? Nope. Can your organs be donated after your death to a dying person without your consent? Nope. We need a wide-ranging, consent-based codified law. This is where the slingshot is aimed at.
Our role in this process isn’t insignificant. But it’s not what you think.
Before action, there is energy.
We’re being invited to take aligned, intentional action, not action based on scattered emotions.
So I present, four proclamations I’ve meditated on, for you to try on so you can be a well-resourced part of this forward movement:
1.We will not feed the fears:
If you spend 30 seconds on social media or the news, you will be sucked into the vortex of sheer terror about what’s crumbling next. Let me share a basic law: what we give energy to WILL always grow. If we fear an outcome and enough of us fear it long enough, it will become reality. My personal rule is I don’t worry about a problem unless it’s at my door. If we pull the slingshot back too far (with fearful energy) it will snap. No movement of transformation and change has occurred through fear. It has occurred though love and stubbornly envisioning a new reality. Conscious, aligned action looks like: protesting but not out of anger for the court, or fear of the future, but out of love for our sisters and daughters, out of hope for our freedom and joy. There’s a massive difference in both, even though the action (protesting) is exactly the same
2. We will not play the victim:
here’s how to tell if someone is in victim mode: 1. They’re spending most of their time blaming external forces for their circumstances 2. They’re feeling angry and entitled most of the time 3. They’re not feeling connected to their power and in control. This is not an empowered place to be in life, both personally and as a leader. We always want to feel we can affect change. It could be something simple like talking to our kids about reproduction or supplying tampons to the local domestic shelter, or meditating and raising the collective vibration.
3. We will manage our emotional energy:
Ultimately if we don’t have mastery over our emotional landscape: how to shift out of emotions that don’t serve our wellbeing well, we are no good to the world. Getting sucked into intense emotions is natural. Staying there is not. I call this the art of the pivot and it’s imperative in this climate, or any climate for that matter, to learn how to stay in the higher vibration energy of love, peace and even joy. This means we can be well-resourced and ABLE to create a reality that works for all of us. If we remain sucked into anger, blame, criticism, we’re in victim mode and disempowered.
4. We will drop the shame around our bodily functions
: This might be the most radical shift we can affect right now. One of the reasons abortion has always been a “women’s issue” is because traditionally our body and her functions have been mired in shame. Think about it: as soon as a girls gets her period, she learns to hide it and avoid talking about it (yet she goes on like nothing is happening). Same for when women are pregnant, give birth (I know women who’ve been severely injured and traumatized during childbirth but never felt safe or comfortable talking about it) or breastfeed. Same for when women have abortions, miscarriages, menopause. We have learned to move through the world in shame and secrecy of our bodily functions. And sex for pleasure? Whoa slut! If we want meaningful change, we must begin talking about our bodily functions with EVERYONE: our partners, children, coworkers and the world just like we say “Pass the salt” at the dining table. ZERO emotional charge. ZERO shame. This is the revolution the world needs today. Women no longer shrinking their power and their body’s intricate and miraculous wisdom to fit in. We fit out by radically accepting and owning that we are different, unique…and quite magical 😉
I understand part of our programming and shame is based in trauma. In the coming weeks I’ll share more resources on how we can navigate that.
But for now, I hope these four proclamations help you make the shift from fear, to hope. Which one resonates most for you at this moment? Let me know by hitting reply. I look forward to keeping this conversation alive.
Until next time…